Loneliness is a universal human experience that can affect individuals at various points in their lives. It is a complex emotion that stems from a combination of psychological, social, and environmental factors.
This article explores the reasons why we feel loneliness, delving into the psychological and social aspects that underlie this prevalent emotional state.
The Psychological Aspect of Loneliness
- Attachment Theory: Attachment theory, proposed by John Bowlby, suggests that our early experiences with caregivers shape our ability to form secure and healthy relationships. Insecure attachments in childhood may lead to a greater susceptibility to loneliness in adulthood (Bowlby, 1969).
- Social Isolation: Loneliness can result from social isolation, whether by choice or circumstance. When individuals lack social interaction, they may experience a sense of disconnection and loneliness (Hawkley & Cacioppo, 2010).
- Low Self-Esteem: Feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, and a negative self-concept can contribute to loneliness. People who do not value themselves often struggle to form and maintain connections (Cacioppo & Patrick, 2008).
The Social Aspect of Loneliness
- Social Transitions: Major life changes such as moving to a new city, starting a new job, or going through a divorce can disrupt social networks and lead to feelings of loneliness (DiTommaso & Spinner, 1993).
- Lack of Social Support: An absence of social support systems, like friends or family, can result in loneliness. People need social connections to fulfill emotional and practical needs (Lakey & Orehek, 2011).
- Social Comparison: Comparing oneself to others and perceiving a lack of social connections in relation to peers can intensify feelings of loneliness. This often happens in the age of social media, where curated images of others’ lives can foster social comparison (Fiske & Taylor, 1984).
The Evolutionary Perspective
- Evolutionary Origin: Some psychologists argue that loneliness may have evolved as an adaptive mechanism to encourage social connections. Feeling lonely might motivate individuals to seek out and maintain relationships, thus increasing their chances of survival (Cacioppo & Hawkley, 2003).
- Social Pain: Loneliness activates brain regions associated with physical pain, leading to the idea that social pain, such as loneliness, serves as a mechanism to alert individuals to potential threats to social connections (Eisenberger, 2012).
Conclusion
Loneliness is a multifaceted emotion that arises from a combination of psychological and social factors. Understanding the various aspects of loneliness is essential for addressing and mitigating this prevalent human experience.
By recognizing the psychological and social underpinnings of loneliness, individuals and society can work towards building connections, offering support, and fostering greater emotional well-being and community.
Sources
- Bowlby, J. (1969). Attachment and Loss: Attachment. Basic Books.
- Hawkley, L. C., & Cacioppo, J. T. (2010). Loneliness Matters: A Theoretical and Empirical Review of Consequences and Mechanisms. Annals of Behavioral Medicine, 40(2), 218-227.
- Cacioppo, J. T., & Patrick, W. (2008). Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection. W. W. Norton & Company.
- DiTommaso, E., & Spinner, B. (1993). The development and initial validation of the Social and Emotional Loneliness Scale for Adults (SELSA). Personality and Individual Differences, 14(1), 127-134.
- Lakey, B., & Orehek, E. (2011). Relational regulation theory: A new approach to explain the link between perceived social support and mental health. Psychological Review, 118(3), 482-495.
- Fiske, S. T., & Taylor, S. E. (1984). Social Cognition. Random House.
- Cacioppo, J. T., & Hawkley, L. C. (2003). Social isolation and health, with an emphasis on underlying mechanisms. Perspectives in Biology and Medicine, 46(3), S39-S52.
- Eisenberger, N. I. (2012). The pain of social disconnection: Examining the shared neural underpinnings of physical and social pain. Nature Reviews Neuroscience, 13(6), 421-434.
